Let me hear you call my name.
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I see no light. Not even a tiny bit.
Saturday, April 2, 2011
When I thought life would be better for me when I enter polytechnic to pursue my favourite course. Indeed I was wrong, foolish and selfish. All I cared was about me. Never once I thought of mom and the family. Now I feel like withdrawing myself and wait for time to pass till next year. I still couldn’t find a way out. I’m still stuck in the zone of the pitch black room. I see no light. Not even a tiny bit. I feel no hand when I fell on my knees.This is the thousands number of times I asked myself about the purpose of my life. Tears just kept flowing down without me noticing. As a matter of fact I just want to curl myself up and cry silently. I do not want the family to hear this. Not even one. My happiness index is off the negative. I don’t feel happy at all. I felt even worse when I want to laugh or smile. I look at those words that you typed to me yesterday. Now I understand deeper the meaning of “Action speaks louder than words” Was I even blind all this while? Maybe I was. I feel like giving up and continue this later once I feel stabilise. Yes, Give up. I always wonder what had happened to my savings – wait do I even have one. I see almost everyone have theirs. Some even have two - A bank account with a parent for their future sake. I have none of this. Not even one. I’m going “미친거니” thinking about it every day. Headache appears every day. I give up......................................................................... |
Goodbye.
Amanda.L
Amalina.I
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